I shall return to the internet on July 31st. Hopefully.
July 20, 2001
July 14, 2001
Note to Self: Things are different now.
July 13, 2001
Update: Still unemployed. Unemployment is a bummer. I don't think I like it.
Me and DJ Audie from KISS FM are still fighting over my parking spot. I have a feeling that the spot does really belong to DJ. The first parkign spot that they gave me here belonged to someone else. I am going to go down to the office this morning... maybe we can figure out what is happening.
July 12, 2001
I am not really back online quite yet, so not too much excitement, okay?
I am on this really crappy dail-up connection that hates my and my computer. I was promised by Pacbell that DSL would be coming soon. I am truely dying without a good internet conection. It changes the way you have to live life. I have been using the phone... and going places... just plain weird.
In Short: The apartment rocks. I love it here. I have not found a job, but I am still looking. Ong and Jess are the coolest neighbors (big hugs and thx). Eddie has not come to visit me yet. I still hate dail-up. Our apartment does look more like an office than an apartment. We only have four computers set-up (out of ten). We have 5 desks and no sofa... or table. I know how to wash dishes. People in apartments cannot park in their own spots... they all have the need to park in mine (Licence plate: DJAUDIE). I have eaten more Ramen than is safe. You can live for a long time without a fridge.
Sorrym but I have to run.
July 07, 2001
Love you all! I am out of here. I am unplugging the cords from my computers as I type. I know not when I will return to the internet. I hope it is soon... could be a week or two if things don't work out right.
I am not sure how I feel about this move, so I am not going to even try. I am just looking to the future.
I am a strange, strange human being. I like hearing about me from other people's angles and views. I like hearing if I am a good person... a sane person... a bad person. It often turns out that people think of me dramatically different than I think of myself. It tears me apart that I don't know if this is a good thing or a bad thing. Should I feel like I am what people think I am? Or is it that thinking I am something different than what people think is what makes me who I am?
I go through phases where... I just hate being me. It is never that I want to be someone else... never. I just get sick and tired of all the things I hate about me... so I try to change... I try to be a better me... a me that I can live with. I don't think I ever change. I just play with my own head until I am okay with it or I just give up... I am not sure which.
Maybe I am not the ever-changing Merc in a slow-paced world. Maybe I am the never-changing Merc in a light-speed world. I just cannot tell right now. I like to think of myself as an innovator... pushing things and people to the next level. Tonight... I feel like I break things and push people of he edge.
This is not a low self-esteem pity party here. Life has so many fine lines... like the fine line between bravery and stupidity. If you take a chance that is against the odds and you are a success... then you were brave. Screw up and all of a sudden you are a moron.
I want to know where I stand. I should know, but I have doubt in my view... and still I push hard everyday. My faith in my hazy vision is a marvel to me... I feel like a machine.
July 05, 2001
Still packing boxes. Woo. Today, I called and got the phone and power set-up. I have a new phone number... that is always fun. I also found out that I will be without DSL for at least a week... maybe longer. If you could have only heard me wine to the lady about it, you would have slapped me... where did I lose my manliness?
This is the greatest thing.... made me laugh. Try this one first.
Changes: I made a few quick changes around here. I traded the count down until my move date in for a nifty little calendar. I added a new section of links to the bottom. First is the Merc Store... which is not a new link... but this is where you can buy nifty Merc clothing. Second is the new pop-up Merc Cam... it has been a long time since I have been on cam, but I am back now. Third, we have the old, old MF.com chatrooms. I like the SpyChat best... but use what you like. Fourth is my Amazon Wish List... hey, everybody else has one... why not Merc? Fifth, we have a nice little link to the archives... I have no idea why, but there it is. And last is the Support link... if you have some strange need to give me money... well there is your chance... I am not going to stop you. Heh heh.
If you notice that something is not working right, just drop me an e-amil. Thx.
July 04, 2001
Am I a nag or what? Damn... I wanna bash someones fiance like this. It really was raining men... I so was not talking about the song... although I did groove. The 4th means nothing to me either. There may be life outside of America, but I want nothing to do with it. We don't need fancy cameras. And finally... girls and farm animals do not mix well.
Page 133: I made it passed the half way point... I would keep going, but I am not feeling so hot. I think it was something that I ate. So I am off to bed.
Chapter 6 kicked my butt. Chapter 7 does not look to rough... I am pushing on into the late night.
Page 82: I am nearing the half-way point (page 125). The book is not over my head yet. I think I am going to take a shower... a long shower and let a bit of this soak in. My goal was to get through this book before the night is over... looks liek it is going to be a close one. Hope I have more energy after the shower. ; ]
And take an oddly large break... heh.
Just finished reading chapter 5 in my PHP book. I think I doing pretty good... understanding and using. PHP is not too rough... at this level.
After a lot off looking and messing around, I have a place to put my PHP stuff... a place that works.
Okay, I am 47 pages into this book. It is time to start programming. As soon as I set up a few working pages, I will post the URL, so you can see how horrible I am doing. Heh heh.
PHP: I have decided that I am going to be learning PHP... today. I am tired of packing and slacking, so I am going to learn. The book is only about 270 pages... so off reading I go.
What holiday?
July 03, 2001
Restate Mission: Searching for a start. It is a difficult thing chasing that one need and unknown thing. I need it, but I have no clue what it is. I feel like a 7th season sitcom. I am running out of good plots... my vision is running dry.
I need to be refreshed... and this move is going to help. I hope. It is going to be a large waste if it does not.
My mind slipped to a new level today. I am feeling very heavy... my whole body is. Not my usual aching mind. Strange... maybe it is just dinner. I don't feeling depressed... but I am not feeling motivated. Maybe the explanation will come to me in the morning.
The new cyber total for jobs is 350 online application submitted. I cannot find another single one. if you can... let me know. I have gotten only two call backs. Kinda depressing.
Today, I raced a guy down Mooney Blvd. It was a good race... weaving through traffic... just about neck and neck. Then we get out in the open with no traffic... we started going faster... pushing 80... in a 55. Then we got a little faster until... 115... still in a 55. At this point... I had to lay off the gas. I was not about to be going 130 through a school zone (25mph). That guy just hammer through the school zone... racing is fun, but that was stupid. In fact, 115 in a 55 is stupid; however, I was winning. Heh heh.
July 02, 2001
Looking for a job? I know where to look. I am not having the best of luck, but I have been to the following.
MammaAnd from PB.
Monster
Techies
HotJobs
Dice
Headhunter
GameJobs
ComputerJobs
Tech-Engine
HireDiversity
AJB
FlipDog
JobsOnline
Thingamajob
Careernet
Vault
JobOptions
JobTrak
JobTrax
NationJobs
JobDB
WetFeet
BrainBuzz
BrassRing
CareerPath
CareerBuilder
FreeAgent
Guru
Jobs
KForce
OperationIT
SkillsVillage
Good morning. Time to get moving... I am runnig out of time quick... stuff to do.
July 01, 2001
After all... tomorrow has a lot of stuff that needs to be done. Wish me luck.
"If I could come back as anything I wish it could be as one of your tears. Who could want anything more than to be conceived in your heart, born in your eyes, live on your cheeks and die on your lips."
Maybe this will work.
Eddie just left. He is taking off to San Diego... aka the land of perfect weather. It is normally a 5 hour drive, so Eddie should be there in about 4 hours. He is a speed demon.
I have packed 16 boxes and it still looks liek I have packed nothing... okay, not nothing, but it does not look like much. The walls and shelves are starting to look pretty naked.
I was broadcasting from here, but I cannot tell if it is working or not. I am also trying to get this to work, but it does not look like it is. My last cam hope is CitizenX... and if I am chatting, I will be here.
Blast from the past:
~~~The Dotumentary~~~
**What is it?
It will be pieces of video-taped interviews edited together to form a cohesive commentary on the social dynamics of a generation online. That's us!
**How did this start?
A group of cclive regulars thought it would be great to express our love for the internet and the friends we've made. We decided video would be the best forum because we could bring all of the pieces together seemlessly.
**Who will be interviewed?
Well, we hope *looks hopeful*...you! If you are reading this email someone in our creative team thinks you are very interesting and would make a great contribution to our endeavor.
**What do I have to do to participate?
Simple. First, join "The Dotumentary" club. Second, put your cute little face in front of a video camera and talk for 15-20 minutes about: 1) Who you are, 2) What role the internet plays in your life. Finally, mail the tape to MercuryFrog. We'll take care of the rest.
**What's the finished product going to look like?
We've created a preview to give you a taste of what we are going for. You can view it on MercuryFrog's cclive page (the link is in his journal).
Here are some interview questions to give you an idea of what information we are looking for:
1. What is your screen name? What does it mean?
2. How much time do you spend on the internet per day/week?
3. How does the internet affect your life?
4. Favorite online moment, or internet related story.
5. Have you met worthwhile people online? Like who? What are they like?
Describe you're interactions/friendships.
6. What kind of music do you like?
7. What are your goals in life?
8. Tell us about your pets.
9. Give us the specs on your machine.
10.What makes you unique? (This is open-ended on purpose) Just tell us who you are, what you are about.
Tips for Shooting Video
1) Try to use a well-lit, quiet area. Avoid background noise, like lawnmowers, vacuum cleaners, or loud fans.
2) Please make sure the camera is in focus, if you use auto-focus be sure
that there is nothing in the foreground that the camera will try to focus on.
3) Speak clearly and so that your comments can be understood by the viewer.
4) Avoid wearing hats or hairdo's that cast dark shadows onto your face.
5) Ideally, we would like to get 15-20 minutes of raw footage, if your footage does not fall in that range please note the length on the label.
6) This will go more smoothly if you can get someone to read you the questions, and monitor your image through the camera.
7) If you do have someone to help you, don't be afraid to experiment with different camera angles.
8) Feel free to show us your room, favorite shirt, computer, etc.
The taping of the interview can be done in approximately 30 minutes, if you plan it out.
Box five: Why do I always make at least one box that is just full of books? Why? Stupid... stupid me.
Box four: I cannot fit all my CDs in one box... does that mean I own too many? And these are not small boxes... good thing too.
Man! After packing only three boxes, I broke my favorite Coca-Cola mug. Slip it right down the middle. What a bummer. Oh well...
The heat is on. Today, I really start packing. I am going to try to get all the un-needed crap out of my room today. I am starting with all my Coca-Cola stuff. That will leave me with naked walls. Next up will be the closet... aka crap pile... if I am in a good mood after that, it will be a mircle.